Therapy 7-24

My feelings about today's session are mixed. Not to say ambivalent, just hard to distill into one or two words. I left feeling disoriented. I entered feeling active, if a tad pensive. At the beginning, first two minutes, I did as I always do: just let my eyes drift, relax a bit. 

Then we spoke of work. There was an incident at my job yesterday which I described. Basically, someone who I used to have a good amount of esteem for, came out and said I messed up a client's Mac, when I never touched it. He asked me, I said no, then he said I did it anyway. It would have taken him all of two minutes to ascertain the true culprit, before pointing fingers. But he didn't do that. He asked, accused me, then checked and found out. I just thought it was low of him to do that, if you ask, and I say no, then take me at my word. I've been nothing but honest while there. As I found out after, that was me being emotional! In recounting my day, I was expressing myself. Who would've thought? 

Then I took a breather, laid down, and the shouting commenced. It built up quickly, from minor whelps to outright screaming. I also shouted Nooooo! and kicked my legs vigorously. To date this session was the most rage I discharged. There was much in my face as well. Sometimes I perceive that a demon lurks inside. At session's summit, I felt disoriented, but told the Doc I would walk it off when he offered to let me stay behind after the office closed.