Illumination
So in pondering over some queries I had stewing around for awhile, after witnessing some fiascos in politics, namely the stealing of the Supreme Court seat, as well as taking into account womens behavior in general, I finally realized that's it's not about being a good person, but about getting what you want. After thats accomplished, then there might be space left to be a good guy. All else is secondary. The answer came to me in a dream, in a conversation with my mother oddly enough.
The other thing was, I'm going to have to build a custom mentality for myself, one unique to me, to what I want, previous habit or childhood be damned. According to what I know, making broad sweeping changes to elements of my psyche and attitude is extremely difficult in a limited time-frame. Much more reliable would be the grind approach--focus on one element at a time, in an ordered manner until you have and are what it is you desire.
Most important is the being.
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