clear vision - clear results

My brother. There was another apparition today, this time at work.  A huge insect, ostensibly a jumbo dozed roach felt the need to crawl onto me toward the end of my shift at work. At home,  I'm seeing spiders frequently, another crawled on me and am having many dreams of my life as a teenager in Syracuse. This happened because I interacted with my brother, who is stuck, alive inside of my mother's toxic dream upstate. My mother,  whom I have excised from my life. But my brother is with her frequently. Since we are blood and therefore resonate,  that minor interaction was all it took to regress me, temporarily.  I can only imagine the trials he is under. Today I made the offer to get him out of there. I'd put up a couple grand and see him freed. Yet, somehow I do not think he will take the offer.  I hate like hell the truth that interacting with him sets me back. I love the kid and want to see him be all he can be.  It is a slow torture to see thi...

I believe last night I finally hit the turning point when it comes to weight issues, and a few other things. my five point plan when it comes to food, is starting to psychically integrate. I've been repeating it every night since around the vernal equinox, with plans to stop on the summer solstice (a full season) but it wasn't only until a few weeks ago that I started repeating each point on the plan 5-10x, which has made a huge difference. this slight adjustment in my psychological self-conditioning has begun to pay huge dividends in terms of my calmness and even discipline in simply following these principles, principles which I've set out for myself and principles that I know will work. when in doubt I can just mentally turn to these principles and get things straightened out. as an example, I haven't eaten before 2:30pm in over 5 weeks now, which is outstanding for me. I finally feel like I'll be fine, which is strange considering how long I've been ...

I woke up this morning feeling as I've never felt. I awoke feeling saturated and chock-full sick of the nonsense. from the madness of online forums, to propaganda perpetrated by the media, by Trump, and everything else. I don't want it anymore.

Man was born free, yet everywhere he is in chains. There's no other way out of this, but to get rich. Then at least, you can call your own shots.

I was sent another vivid reminder of this on Wednesday, as I awoke to see the biggest insect I have ever seen crawl into my bed to greet me good morning. It starting scrabbling around my leg, rousing me from sleep. I had to use a washcloth to kill the thing it was so large. This was a very clear signal from the universe to forget about previous women, and leave them behind mentally. They were dirty, scheming and unbecoming of me overall. so here I am. It never ceases to amaze me how fast negative intentions materialize in this world. Building something positive takes time, but to dissipate it? Happens in an instant. I'll keep my focus on girls to be, rather than girls-that-were.

Last night I dreamt of her once more. But it was different.  The feel was different.  earlier in the day I asked for a shield, to protect me from the moral depravity of women. At night I had the dream of her walking away from me, in what instance I do not recall. Whereas before I would've felt loss at this upon awakening, this time, there was only a flat acceptance. Farewell my darling.  I loved you so dearly. And I will not forget. Perhaps in years far ahead will I hearken back to our past adventures, forever stored in my memories museum. But I must keep moving. I will appreciate what you meant to me.

I had an interesting encounter today at the gas station. while wearing my Irish NYC t-shirt, similar to this: A patron entered behind me, and immediately noted how "you don't look Irish". I took the comment at face value, to mean that I have some African resemblance, presumably being black or at the least, not "pure" Irish so I said "half-way". I asked if he had ever been to Ireland, he said no. I then told him that not all Irish looked the same. he then said, to himself: "well, I'm American" and that was the end of it.  I began to wonder what in my environment or mindset had shifted to put forward this negative movement. I then realized after some reflection, my thoughts have shifted toward blacks in general. I am starting to believe they have high potential, maybe the highest of all 'races', but haven't been living up to that in America, to say the least. I thought about how long it would take them to reform their...