the truth, as women will tell it

I was reading some threads on catholic.com and the juxtaposition of them was extremely lucid and instructive in relation to my understanding of females and their motivations (and machinations).

On one thread [http://forums.catholic.com/showthread.php?t=870532] a man left his city on a business trip and his wife took that opportunity to step out on him. Even worse, she became pregnant from that encounter. Worse still, the baby is of a different race, only adding to his shame and frustration. Now, the advice in that thread, mainly from women and zombie males, was indirectly stating that he should support that child, and respect her feelings. Respect her feelings eh? What is there to respect from a woman who explicitly seeks to become impregnated by another male without even the possibility of being able to conceal it as her husband’s own, as is frequently done, due to the differing race? To me it almost seemed as if the women in their comments were verbally tip-toeing around the whale in the water, which is that his wife was responsible for her actions; she cheated bottom line and the family as a whole will have to pay for it (mostly him). The thread itself eventually turned into an effort to ensure his pacified and guilt-ridden frame of reference (he blamed himself for not being there and working too hard—and the women there did not disagree). Nonsense. He did the right thing in terms of work ethic, to support his existing family. He simply wasn’t equipped with the correct understanding of women in general, and as a result he will (willingly) be on the hook for another man’s child. One person tried to get him to wake up, but he ended up being quickly banned for his efforts.

Compare this to the next case: http://forums.catholic.com/showthread.php?t=873039

A woman created the thread, stating that her husband was the one who stepped out here. On top of that, from this encounter he did birth a child with his mistress, and desired to raise it along with the family he currently possessed, with the thread starter. So some responsibility was taken on his part. But he was vilified anyway. The response, tone and nature of the comments toward her were far different than the man above. “Get an STD test“, “it was his fault, not yours”, one woman even had the low audacity to post the results of her violent imagination in that if she were aggrieved in a similar way as this, she’d kill her husband outright, as she was a deadly shot. No punches were pulled in favor of the woman, it was all “real talk” when one of their own needed strong, actionable advice. But when the man was hurting, as in the previous case? “Respect her feelings” is what he got, basically meaning “go back to sleep” underlying as the essential subtext in their comments.

Reading this, it dawned on me that most women, and indeed, most people seem to have a vested interest in ensuring man remains “asleep”, that is, unable to see and interpret what is truly going on in front of him. In the first example, it was easy to mollify him, for he had no desire to look and see the truth for what it was, so after a schema altering event such as this, let a couple of siren songs play courtesy of the ladies on catholic.com, and the net effect is him being cooed gently back into that good night.

Looking at the phenomenon further, one has to ask, why is this the case? Why such a disparity in the tone and quality of the advice given by exactly the same pool of women? I have a few theories but none of them are good and as such I will refrain from printing them, suffice it to say, notwithstanding any gender equalist theories that are popular in the present day, women’s interests are at times, far from correlating exactly to those of man.

I almost feel some sort of sadness for the cuckolded man, as his life will only grow that much worse with this knowledge of his wife’s betrayal, forever staring back at him in that guise he will know as “daughter”, or “son”. There isn’t even a chance for pleasant deception, being that the child is of different race. A tinge of melancholia nearly rises in me at his lack of querulousness; he could’ve extended this life altering event into a journey, a journey to seek out answers, and find, eventually, the truth as to why this happened to him; a stable, loving father who wanted nothing more than to provide for & raise his children in a happy home with a caring wife.

Instead, as it stands: he doesn’t have a chance.