Duty, mandated effects

5/28 7:32pm

Need some time, to figure out what its all about. Everyone is lying, money is not real. however, it has a super reality in civilized world.

I am still, as of yet, divorced somewhat from these notions of value. What of family? Did I truly abandon them, because they could not provide value in return? Did I adjourn my duties, as the strongest, the oldest, the first born?

Mandated effects...how we are supposed to feel. There is a yawning gap, growing wider on the day between my social persona, and who I perceive myself to be underneath. Most cannot tell the difference, if the d actions and words remain the same, but then, in silence, most can. Reflexive response is my enemy. My conditioned moods are increasingly becoming ego dystonic...

Location: Lower Manhattan, Manhattan

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